Life Coach DM & 
the Massive Mindset Shift?

Dream More, Do More, With Life Coach DM!

Click here to edit subtitle

Blog

I believe Everyone deserves to be successful, happy and abundant in all areas of their life.  This Blog addresses this belief and many of the areas of life coaching that I specialize in and life in general. Please contact me if there is a topic you would like to see covered.
view:  full / summary

The Surprising Link Between Productivity and Happiness

Posted on November 28, 2017 at 7:50 PM Comments comments (0)

 

What have you done today? What did you achieve yesterday? Do you take on a can-do spirit when you’re challenged? Or are you huddled up in your comfy chair deeply immersed in a movie or playing a game on your electronic device to avoid the challenge?


How you make your way through an average day in terms of your productivity may determine how pleased with life you are.


Consider these gems when deciding whether to do something productive or avoid it:


1. Ponder your feelings. Reflect on your emotions after doing something productive versus wasting a few hours channel-surfing or just hanging out. Think about which situation makes you feel more positive and content.


2. How are your organizational skills? Someone who’s organized usually finds it easier to accomplish desired goals. If you’re organized, you know where to find the correct tool quickly to put it to use. Living a disorganized existence means much time is lost trying to locate things. Therefore, productivity is reduced.


3. Make lists if you want to get things done. A to-do list will quickly remind you of what you hope to complete. Plus, crossing items off that list brings positive feelings of satisfaction.


4. Complete tasks in the morning when you’re rested. What’s cool about getting started early is that you can see signs of your productivity by noon. You may be tired, but having lunch will revive you for the afternoon, plus you’ll feel accomplished.

    • Establish a pattern of knocking out a couple of items on your to-do list in the morning.


5. Have a schedule and follow it. If you want to be productive, schedule in time for work and rest.

     • At the end of the day, you’ve met your productivity goals and still have some play time. Your confidence likely increases from your higher productivity level. Plus, your level of contentment has grown because you experienced some free time, too. That’s two reasons to be happy!

     • If you’re floundering to get something done, set up a time to do it.

     • Let’s say you’ve wanted to clean out the garage for ages, but you’ve consistently come up with excuses why you’ve not yet done it. Establish a day and time you’ll devote to garage-cleaning, like Thursday from 9 a.m. to noon. Then do it.


6. Develop rituals and routines to help you separate down time from productive time. Maybe it’s something simple like putting on your watch when you want to get work done. Or donning nicer clothing when you wish to be productive. Maybe you put on your house shoes when you’re preparing to lounge around.

     • Simple behaviors can serve as powerful reminders that it’s time to work or play.


7. Pay close attention to how you speak to yourself. When you complete a task, do you say something to yourself like, “Good job” or “Wow, you completed that quickly” or “Way to go”? Or do you spoil it by saying things like, “What took you so long” or “It’s about time”?

     • It’s helpful to take note of what you say to yourself during moments you choose to waste away. Perhaps you’re telling yourself,    “I hate doing X” or “I’m avoiding doing Y as long as I can.”

     • What you say to yourself is powerful and sets the tone for how you’ll proceed. Avoid using negative phrasing to increase productivity and happiness.


Your choice to get things done plays very much into your level of happiness. Concentrate on increasing task completion. You’ll be happy you did!

KEEP ON KEEPING ON!

Posted on August 6, 2017 at 4:05 PM Comments comments (0)

"The older I get, the more I realize that just keeping on keeping on is what life's all about." Janis Ian

We all have felt at times like the world has crumbled upon ourselves. We've felt in a hole, a dark bit of reality, caused by negative feelings. It can be disappointments, bad news, a difficult moment in a relationship, failures, you name it.


In those times, it can be really hard to see the way out. We only know it's necessary to get out, for our own sake (the realization coming sometimes after quite a while). How do you put yourself together? How do you decide it's important to move on and you're ready to let go? What would be the best frame of mind to have?


I’ve been there, I know that feeling. I pulled myself out of depression years ago. It’s absolutely amazing that I haven’t fallen back into the struggle. I have been challenged in so many ways over the past year or so. It started with losing my mom, struggling with a change in ownership at my job, losing staff that were not replaced, having to sell my home which my boys grew up in due to divorce, and just a few weeks ago… breaking my leg and having to have surgery. Thankfully, I’ve been able to keep my head about me and keep a positive frame of mind.


Whenever you want to get out of that “bad situation frame of mind” you just need to realise that the answers to how can only be found in yourself. Give yourself importance. Realise that there's nobody else that can be you better than you, right now, or ever.


You need to turn to yourself and focus. Forget about what caused you to be in the bad-feeling situation and forget about all your feelings. Focus on who you are and what you want - to achieve, to become, to have... If you have a clearly defined goal, focus on it.


Concentrate on how it would feel to achieve what you want. Feel good. Enjoy feeling good. Use this energy as strength to go ahead. Whenever you start feeling bad, come back to what makes you feel good and light the fire. Years ago when I was a teenager, my go to was dance. Now in my later years, it’s meditation, writing and the outdoors.


Know that there is nothing to fear and you will never be alone, for there will always be someone at there for you. Decide to have a positive attitude no matter what.


Besides, there is nobody or anything bigger than you. You are perfectly capable of enjoying a good life within yourself, and you do not need anybody else to help you do so.


Have the courage to be yourself and do what you must to achieve what you want. The strength that you need is always within yourself. Remind yourself of your goals. Don't ever give up.


Feel good with yourself and keep on keeping on!

Let's do this together!
Peace, Happiness and Light to you!

Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!


Top 5 Ways to Develop a Powerful Work Ethic and Get More Done

Posted on April 11, 2017 at 9:45 PM Comments comments (0)

Do you feel like you’re just unable to get things done, no matter how hard you try? Some people have a knack for taking care of business, while the rest of us have loose ends dangling all over our lives. If you struggle with completing important tasks, you likely lack a strong work ethic.


What exactly is a work ethic? It’s a set of principles based around the idea that there is a moral virtue in hard work and persistence.


You undoubtedly know people with very strong work ethics, and others who are sorely lacking in this area. Unsurprisingly, those with strong work ethics are also the ones who seem to always be able to get more done.


Try these strategies to strengthen your work ethic:


1. Learn to finish. Many individuals have trouble getting started with their work, but seem to do well once that initial hurdle is cleared. Others are fine getting out of the gate, but they fail to complete anything.


  • There are many tasks that are challenging to finish because the amount of time spent on the last 10% of the work can be considerable. Many tasks are like building a house. If you’ve ever built a house, you know that the last 5% of the job can take 20% of the time. It’s all the little odds and ends that are time-consuming, but fail to show visible progress.

  • Although it takes determination to see a project through to completion, once it’s done it’s off your plate completely. Finishing projects also frees up a lot of mental energy.


2. Learn to work longer. Working is a lot like exercise. Your body and mind get used to working for a certain period of time. After that amount of time, your focus starts to wane and mental exhaustion sets in.

  • If you take a break every time you feel like it, you’ll fail to ever work any longer or harder than you do now.
  • Use a timer. See how long you can work before your performance starts to go downhill. Then, extend that period of time by 10% and keep on working. In time, your ability to focus on your work for longer periods of time will increase. Be proud of the positive changes you see over time.


3. Eliminate distractions. Turn off your cell phone. Close your office door. Try a computer app that will lock down your internet access beyond your immediate task.


4. Learn to do things now. For 2 weeks, try to immediately attack any work that needs to be done. It doesn’t matter if it’s preparing a report at work or mowing the grass at home. If it needs to be done, do it. View it as an experiment. If you’re unhappy with the results, you can go back to your old ways.


5. Be thorough when completing tasks. It’s not enough to get things done. A good work ethic also consists of doing quality work.

  • It’s easy to fall into the trap of getting things done quickly and just “good enough,” but poor quality work will frequently come back to haunt you.

Having a strong work ethic creates powerful results. We all know someone with minimal skills that’s very successful. It’s likely they have a very strong work ethic. Imagine if you could combine a solid work ethic with your intelligence, education, and other skills. You’d be unstoppable!


9 BELIEFS THAT MAKE LIFE EASIER AND SUCCESS MORE LIKELY

Posted on December 18, 2016 at 3:40 PM Comments comments (3)

"Having the positive belief that it will all be O.K. just means that you hustle and make it work because failure is not even an option in your own mind."  Natalie Massenet

Recommended Reading: Character Strengths and Virtues: A Handbook... by Christopher Peterson 

 

What are your life beliefs? It’s our beliefs that determine our actions. And our actions determine our results. If you’re not getting the results you desire, your beliefs deserve some examination. Your beliefs are the core of your results. Life and success are both easier and more consistent when your beliefs are supportive.

 

I write this today as I sit bedside with my son in the hospital. He was admitted on Thursday with a lung that was 100% collapsed. I’ve been with him day and night and the prognosis is not getting any better. In fact over the past few day, we get good news then bad then good again and the doctors keep flip flopping which can be very frustrating if you let it get to you. They say that he may need surgery. Some mothers would be besides themselves. However, my son and I are in great spirits! How are we getting through this? We have strong positive life beliefs.

 

Adopt these beliefs and your life can change for the better:

 

1. There is a way. If you don’t believe you can succeed at a particular task or goal, you’ll never get started. It just wouldn’t make any sense. You’re much more likely to chase those big goals if you believe there is a path that works for you.

 

2. Everyone is doing the best they can. It’s easy to take things personally when people are cross or let us down. In many instances, you aren’t the issue. The other person could be having a bad day or maybe had a rough childhood or simply they don’t have all the information they need.

 

• This belief doesn’t imply that everyone is operating at the limit of their potential. But given a person’s past experiences, present circumstances, and belief system, they believe they’re doing the best they can at this moment.

 

3. Failure is a learning tool. At some point, it’s necessary to stop learning, thinking, and planning, and pull the trigger. Your results determine your next step. See what happens and adjust your aim. The only way to avoid failure is to never do anything. Failure is part of success.

 

4. I can do anything, but I can’t do everything. There are few limits to what you can do. You could climb Mount Everest, be a movie star, astronaut, or neurosurgeon. You can do one or two of these, but it’s unlikely you could do all of them. Select the most important objectives in your life and let the others go.

 

5. Small improvements are enough. Fast results require big changes, but those big changes can occur over a long period of time. Trying to change too much, too fast, is unlikely to work in the long-term. It’s too uncomfortable. Introduce changes slowly. A small change that’s maintained and built upon has a huge effect over time.

 

6. I don’t need to be the best. Your lawyer, third-grade teacher, doctor, and mechanic are almost certainly not the best in their respective fields. You can achieve a high-level of success without being the best at anything.

 

7. It will all be over someday. Not to be morbid, but no one lives forever. A time will come when you’re gone, and there will be no one left that remembers you. That might sound depressing, but it can be very liberating. None of your mistakes will matter in the end. Enjoy your life and take a few chances.

 

 

8. Good things often take time. Our society is impatient. We want everything yesterday. Most good things take time to create. If you want something spectacular in your life, be patient. It’s important to work hard, but temper your expectations with regards to the timing of it all. Learn to enjoy the process.

 

9. I already have everything I need to get started. Getting started is perhaps the biggest obstacle in life. For whatever reason, we have 100 excuses why we should put things off. Some of us wait to start diets on the first day of the month. Or we always need to acquire or learn one more thing before the time is right.

 

• You already have what you need to take the first step today. You can make adjustments and learn a little more tomorrow.

 

Can you see how these beliefs would enhance your life? A few, simple beliefs can make all the difference. Enjoy your life more and celebrate more success. Consider the impact your beliefs are having on your life.

 

Let's do this together!
Peace, Happiness and Light to you!

Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!

HOW TO REDUCE STRESS WHEN IMPLEMENTING CHANGES IN YOUR LIFE

Posted on November 13, 2016 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Today’s Book: Search Inside Yourself: The Unexpected Path to Achieving Success, Happiness (and World Peace) By Chade-Meng Tan, Daniel Goleman, Jon Kabat-Zinn

 

One thing I know a lot about is change. Just as the seasons change, life is full of never ending changes. Some of the best changes in life are those that you make on your own accord. Changes that we make of our own accord can include marriage, children, divorce, weight loss, new job, or a new relationship. The decision to make a change, can sometimes be stressful. However, these changes can help you get over some hurdles or make a positive impact on your life. Yet, instituting change can be quite challenging. How can you go about bringing a much-desired change to your life?

 

Try these strategies when you wish to alter your current state:

 

1. Ensure you have a clear understanding of what you’d like to change about your life. Is it your job? Initiating or ending a relationship? Moving to a place that fits you better? Write down in a sentence or two regarding the changes you seek. Be as specific as possible, include all the details.

 

2. Know why you want the change. Being cognizant of your reasons for change will deepen your understanding of yourself and what you wish for your future. It can also help you to tweak what it is you truly wish to accomplish. Having clarity now pays off later.

 

3. Explore realistic options for how to bring on the change. What do you need to do to make it happen?

 

 

  • Making a desired change often involves a step-by-step process rather than one big “jump.”
  • Write out your plan of action.

 

 

4. Focus on making one change at a time. Concentrate your energies on one goal, only one change you wish to make. Your chances of being successful will increase with this approach. When you see that you can achieve one change, you’ll gain confidence when making other changes.

 

5. Find your confidence. When was the last time you did something you were really proud of? Gather your self-assurance and ignite your efforts to begin making changes.

 

6. Use positive self-talk. Tell yourself that you know you can create the life you want - one step at a time.

 

  • Use affirmations such as “I deserve this better life”, “I am the creator of my life”, “I am successful”.

 

 

7. Discuss your wishes with your significant other. It’s important that you discuss your desired changes with your partner and that both of you devise an agreeable plan to move forward together.

 

8. Refuse to let anyone or anything stop you. When it comes to making an important life change, those around you might disagree with your decision to alter your life. Many may reflect their fears on you. Be fearless!

 

 

  • Listen carefully to the opinions of your loved ones. Then, proceed ahead on your well-planned course, taking their ideas into consideration if you found them useful.
  • Remember opinions are just that. However, accepting advise from those who have already made a successful change such as yours may be more valuable.

 

 

9. Garner support. Surround yourself with supportive people who will provide encouragement to you in your quest for change. Join a support group or club with members who are interested in the change you’re working on. Group support can be incredibly powerful.

 

 

  • A life coach can also be a great support person, guiding you through your decision-making process every step of the way.

 

 

10. Find a great mentor. When you consult with others who have already achieved what you’re hoping to accomplish, it will galvanize you in your efforts to change. It’s wonderful to have direct contact with someone who’s done what you’re striving to do.

 

 

  • For the fastest results, communicate with your mentor by e-mail or telephone on a regular basis.

 

 

Making changes in life can be onerous, yet very rewarding. When you discover that you can create the life you deserve by making some adjustments here and there, you can move closer toward your goals in life with greater passion and confidence.

 

Let's do this together!

Peace, Happiness and Light to you!

 

Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

 

Request a Free Coaching Session Today

 


9 SECRETS TO LIVING A MEANINGFUL LIFE

Posted on October 13, 2016 at 5:00 AM Comments comments (0)

“It is better to have a meaningful life and make a difference than to merely have a long life.”  Bryant H. McGill

Today’s book: Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book That Changes Lives by Dan Millman

The hustle and bustle of daily life can sweep us away from what really means the most to us. It’s up to each one of us to figure out how to live a personally fulfilling life. Although much of your life is shared with others, you can still carve out your own space for a rich, meaningful life.

Take action now to live a life that you love:

1. Decide what matters most to you. If you say family is your number one priority, do you spend the majority of your spare time with them? How you spend your time largely determines what’s important to you. When you are ascertained who and what matters most to you, then that’s where you want to focus your time and energy.

2. Be present and mindful. If you’re planting flowers, think about packing the earth well and digging the hole deeply enough. Remind yourself to water them immediately afterward. Regardless of what you’re involved in, keep your mind focused.

• Even when you’re doing laundry, you can focus on how much you love the fresh clean smell and the warmth of the clothes and softness of the towels fresh out of the dryer.

3. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Do your words carilled with kindness and care, and carry along with them importance and honesty? Avoid mincing words. Get to the point, but remember to take the other person’s feelings into consideration. When your conversations contain subjects of interest and heartfelt feelings, it’s meaningful for you and the listener.

4. Find your passion. What peeks your interest, gets you excited, or fascinated? Has there ever been a subject that you think about all day long to the point where you can hardly stand it? If so, follow your passion. Make it an important part of your life as often as you can.

• If it’s chess, play it as often as you can. If your passion is working with children, then pursue it, whether it’s through working at a nursery school, becoming a school teacher, or volunteering as the neighborhood babysitter. Make it happen.

5. Don’t worry about what others think. Pay attention to what you think more than what anyone else thinks. If someone isn’t a relevant player in your personal life, then what they believe about you is irrelevant. What you believe about yourself is what matters.

• Use your emotional fortitude in ways that make your life better. Ensure that your opinion of yourself is great! Enforce this way of thinking with daily affirmations.

6. Instead of complaining, accept the situation or take action. You can’t control every situation. If you feel that something is out of your control, it’s likely time to just accept it. However, if it’s something that you’re not happy with is within your power to change, take action. Complaining is a waste of your precious time. Focus on problem-solving instead.

7. Accept responsibility for your life. If you’re unhappy, there’s no one else to blame. Sure others may have had a part in getting you to where you are now, but really, who had the final say? You always have the option to take action to change a situation. Step up and make some decisions to alter what troubles you.

• You are the captain of your own ship. Figure out the course you want to take and then stay on it.

8. Refuse to be judgmental. Focus on assessing your own life. Notice the good qualities in others vs. pointing out the negative. Making positive changes in yourself is where your power lies.

9. “Be the change you want to see in the world.” Said Mahatma Gandhi, a great man of peace. Make a difference in your own life and the lives of others. You’ll absolutely love yourself for it. Others will love what you’re doing, too. Volunteer. Join a club. Get involved!

An enriched, meaningful life is here for the taking. When your focus is clear, you can then expend your energy on the people and things that matter in your life. Isn’t it time to begin the journey toward a life filled with positivity and meaning? You deserve it!

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!

Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!

Check out all the recommended readings and purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!!

LIVING LIFE IN THE MOMENT

Posted on May 1, 2016 at 6:35 AM Comments comments (0)

“You can't live for a moment that may not happen. You need to live in the moment.” Jake Roberts

 

Today’s book: The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment By Eckhart Tolle

 

It’s impossible to enjoy life at the highest level without being fully aware of the present moment. Life can only be lived in the present. Often our minds are preoccupied with multiple things, none of which is occurring right now. We’re constantly thinking about things that happened already or imagining things that haven’t taken place yet.

 

Our minds are very active and constantly attempting to break free to occupy themselves with the past, the future, and pure fantasy. While it’s good to prepare for the future and learn from the past, focusing primarily on the present has many benefits.

 

Here are 11 ways that you can start to live life in the moment and be present:

 

1. Avoid worry. Worrying can only happen when you look to the future. Keep your thoughts on your environment and your current activity. You can’t worry if you leave the future alone. It’s not here yet and what you are worrying about may not even come to fruition.

 

2. Avoid regret. Regret arrives while thinking about the past. The past is over and no longer exists. You bring your past mistakes to life by thinking about them. Let them go.

 

3. Turn off electronic devices. Cell phones, computers, iPods, and gaming systems distract from the present moment. Find your enjoyment in your life rather than in an imaginary world or in frivolous communication. It’s really a great feeling to disconnect at least once in a while and have a real conversation with a friend or relative.

 

4. Avoid multitasking. Try doing one task at a time. Current research is overwhelmingly in favor of single-tasking. You’ll find you perform the task faster and at a higher level. Let multitasking be a thing of the past. Single-tasking is much more conducive to living in the present.

 

5. Eliminate unnecessary items. Having too many possessions is more of a burden than an advantage. Owning too many things results in disorder that clutters both your physical environment and your mind. If you don’t need it, consider giving it away or selling it.

 

6. Forgive. When you hold a grudge, the only one suffering is you! Anger is distracting and keeps you from enjoying the current moment. Forgive and forget!

 

7. Go slowly and deliberately. Rushing creates a unique type of anxiety. Give yourself the time you need to enjoy the current activity. Address one task at a time and give it your full attention.

 

8. Listen. If someone is speaking to you, give them your full attention and participate in the conversation to the best of your ability. Don’t just hear, stay focused and really listen.

 

9. Spend 5 minutes of each hour describing your environment. Take 5 minutes and describe to yourself everything you see, hear, smell, and feel. It’s an easy way to bring your mind back to the present moment and keep it there. There’s no way to compete the exercise without being mindful.

 

10. Eat slowly and enjoy your food. By eating slower, you’ll have the chance to enjoy your food more. You’ll also eat less, which is a good thing for many of us. One bite at a time. Think about the flavor, the texture, the gratitude you have for being nourished. Try eating an entire orange one piece at a time. Go slowly and focus on the flavor of each section.

 

11. Under schedule. Too many obligations results in a crowded schedule and time concerns. It’s not easy to stay focused on the current task if you’re worried about being on time for the next one. Leave space between your obligations. Do less and experience more.

 

Avoid missing out on your life and losing so much time to the past and the future. Living in the moment is a habit and a skill. Indulging in worry and regret are also habits. While it’s not possible to live entirely in the moment, life is more enjoyable and meaningful when your focus is on the present. Namaste my friends.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Peace, Happiness and Light to you!

Dawn-Marie

Your Life Coach
Request a Free Coaching Session Today!
Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!! 

 


HOW CAN PERSONAL BOUNDARIES EMPOWER YOU?

Posted on November 5, 2015 at 6:30 AM Comments comments (0)

“You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of.” Jim Rohn

 

Today’s book: Search Inside Yourself: The Unexpected Path to Achieving Success, Happiness (and World Peace) By Chade-Meng Tan

 

Personal boundaries are important for several reasons. They serve as a barricade to protect your self-esteem. They’re also tools for establishing limits with others and communicating that you won’t tolerate certain behaviors. Those without personal boundaries commonly end up in less than ideal relationships and situations.

 

Without limits, you will become a victim to the whims of those around you. Personal boundaries are about respecting yourself and demanding respect from others.

 

How can you establish personal boundries?

 

1. Value yourself. You have the ability to set your own boundaries as only you see fit. Few people will treat you better than you demand, so take responsibility for taking care of yourself. Unfortunately, no one else is going to take responsibility for you or your well-being.

 

2. Define yourself. Decide who you are, what you want to be, and how you deserve to be treated. What are you willing to accept from others? What are you no longer willing to accept?

 

• If you don’t define yourself, the rest of the world will do it for you. And you won’t like it.

 

3. Place a priority on yourself. Others are important, but they’re not any more important than you. If you take care of yourself first, you’re in a better position to take care of others. Running yourself ragged for others really isn’t helping anyone. You’ll be a better parent, spouse, and employee when you take good care of yourself.

 

4. Consider where you need to set limits in your life. Maybe you need to put an end to volunteering to work Saturdays or stop accepting emotional abuse from your boyfriend. Maybe you’re just too willing to loan money to people that never pay you back.

 

• You get in life what you’re willing to tolerate. What are you no longer willing to tolerate?

 

5. Make your boundaries firm and clear. Make your boundaries reasonable, but clear to others. If others know where you stand on certain issues, there’s less chance for confusion or miscommunication. It’s possible to have boundaries that are too strict.

 

• If you’re alone and overly self-sufficient, you’re probably suffering from overly strict personal boundaries.

 

6. Be flexible. You don’t have to follow a rule 100% of the time. Decide who and what you want to let in and what’s best to keep out. Studies have shown that people with some flexibility in their personal boundaries tend to have to best combination of happiness and success. Being too rigid can be just as problematic as being too lax.

 

7. Learn to say no when needed. Boundaries are limits on what you’ll accept from others. Avoid falling victim to the tendency to make everyone else happy. Healthy boundaries and being a little selfish go hand-in-hand. Try saying “no” to someone today. The world won’t come to an end.

 

8. Communicate openly. When people cross your boundaries, it’s up to you to inform them. Many times, this is as simple as refusing a request. You may be required to provide more explanation in other instances.

 

• Others are unable to give you what you want if you don’t provide feedback.

 

Having boundaries is an exercise in caring for and respecting yourself. You have the right to expect a certain level of respect and consideration from others.

 

If your lack of personal boundaries is creating challenges for you, now is the time to start taking better care of yourself. Adequate boundaries are not only good for your self-esteem and general mental health, but for all other aspects of your life. You also put yourself in a better position to care for your friends and family.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Peace, Happiness and Light to you!

 

Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!
Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!!

 


WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT

Posted on November 1, 2015 at 8:55 PM Comments comments (0)

 

“Indecision and delays are the parents of failure.” George Canning 


Today’s Book: Comfortable with Uncertainty: 108 Teachings on Cultivating Fearlessness and Compassion By Pema Chödrön


We’ve all been there. It’s easy to get stuck when none of your options aren’t black and white, clear cut as they say. One job has better hours and the work is what you love doing, but the other possibility offers a better salary which means more stability in your life. The best options may not always be that obvious.


Unfortunately, failing to make decisions in a timely matter can have negative repercussions. With more time, you can develop more elegant solutions. When time is short, you’re limited to just a few options, none of which may be very good.


Keep these ideas in mind when you’re unsure of what you want:


1. Know your values. It’s much more challenging to make a choice when you’re unclear and lack a good view of yourself and what’s important to you. Those who are well in-tune with their values have a much easier time making decisions.


2. Have goals. When you know exactly where you’re headed, most of the options can be eliminated quickly. Does a particular possibility bring you closer to reaching your goal? The more your decisions are based around your goals, the more likely you are to accomplish them. Keep your goals fresh in your mind.


3. Collect the information you require. Wise decisions require good information. Most of us either fail to gather enough information or we’re forever stuck on this step.

 • Knowing yourself and your goals can dramatically reduce the amount of time needed to navigate your information-gathering efforts.


4. Examine your fear of failure. It’s common to shun actions that may result in failure. Ensure you’re not basing your decisions too much on the likelihood of success but rather on your heart’s desire.

 • Avoid allowing a little uncertainty to prevent you from fully living your life.


5. Keep the long-term in mind. Many individuals are shortsighted. Prepare a foundation for the future. You may choose the easier option today with the intention of straightening things out down the road. However, it’s generally harder to change course once you’ve gained momentum.


6. Consider the risks. Managing risk isn’t just for investments. All decisions carry some element of risk. Consider what’s at stake before making a final decision.


7. Set a deadline. We’re all used to deadlines, whether they relate to a project at work or choosing a vacation destination. Give yourself a reasonable deadline and stick to it.


8. Choose. If you’re still stuck after applying all the suggestions listed above, just choose something. All the options are likely to produce a similar outcome. Pick one and begin taking action. Failing to choose is choosing to fail.


 • No progress can be made without a clear and committed decision. Even flipping a coin is infinitely more effective than failing to decide. Be confident and make a decision!


When you fail to decide what you want, you’re ultimately stuck with the simplest option available. If you don’t decide what your life will be like, outside forces will decide it for you. Avoid putting yourself in this situation.


Suppose you need to find a new apartment to rent. With a 3-month deadline, you have far more options than you do with a 7-day deadline. If you wait too long to decide what you want, you lose flexibility and your options are greatly restricted. Make your decisions intelligently and quickly. Your life will be more rewarding and less stressful.


Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Peace, Happiness and Light to you!


Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

 

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!

Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

 

AN ACHIEVER OR AN EXCUSIOLOGIST - WHICH ONE ARE YOU?

Posted on September 9, 2015 at 11:40 PM Comments comments (0)


View Today's Video Blog

"He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else." Benjamin Franklin

Today's Book: The Success Principles(TM): How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be By Jack Canfield, Janet Switzer

 

It would be a fairly safe bet that if you are reading this then you are on the lookout for something more in your life than what you already have.

 

Whether you are searching for a new business, a new opportunity, a part-time income or even a lotto system it all stems from one source - dissatisfaction of present circumstances.

 

Now you might already be quite successful at what you do, so you might be coming from a position of boredom. Nevertheless, what you are seeking is change. Let me tell you a little secret...

 

There will be NO change in your life until there is a change in YOU.

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Peace, Happiness and Light to you!

Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!

Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

3 TIPS TO BREAK FREE FROM CRIPPLING SELF-DOUBTS

Posted on September 4, 2015 at 9:30 AM Comments comments (0)

“However you arrive at the ability to ignore self-doubt - if you can acquire it or possess it or find it or discover it - move beyond self-doubt.” Dwight Yoakam

 

Today’s Book: “The Success Principles(TM) - 10th Anniversary Edition: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be” By Jack Canfield, Janet Switzer

 

Poor lack of self-confidence and self-esteem can be just as damaging to our lives as being overconfident or arrogant. Do you harbor insecurities about your true abilities and worth? If so, this doubt is holding you back from reaching your full potential.

 

Know now that you don’t have to let fear keep you from achieving your dreams and ambitions in life. There are steps you can take that will help you build your confidence, face your fears, and become free of self-doubt.

 

Try these tips to eliminate your self-doubt, gain confidence, and succeed:

 

1. Reflect on your past success. It's natural to feel a bit nervous if you've just been given a new task or responsibility. If you start to doubt your abilities, reflect on your past achievements and feel confident that your prior successes will carry over into this new area.

 

• Even if you have some lingering doubts, be confident with the knowledge that you wouldn’t be in this new position if others didn’t think you were up to the challenge.

 

Seeking additional skill training in an area that matches or compliments your new duties can give you confidence in your new role.

 

• Be willing to ask others for advice and guidance as you adjust to your new role. Their feedback can help you increase your skills and boost your self-esteem.

 

2. Learn to change your negative self-talk into positive affirmations. Our brains are constantly working to fulfill our inner thoughts and beliefs. When you’re overwhelmed with self-doubt, chances are that you’re subconsciously listening to negative self-talk from your brain.

 

• Take control of your inner voice and turn a negative into a positive by replacing your doubts with positive affirmations!

 

• Don’t focus on your limitations, focus on what you can do. Capitalize on your strengths and write out 10 statements that affirm who you are at the core of your being. Then record how your strength and abilities will help you achieve your task or goal.

 

• Start each day by repeating your daily affirmations. Then, repeat them whenever you start to worry or feel self-doubt.

 

3. Gain perspective by finding cheerleaders, mentors, and other guides. Do you have a difficult time maintaining a positive sense of self-worth? It’s critical that you take time to connect and build relationships with those that build you up, rather than tear you down.

 

• Seek out mentors for your personal and professional life that can give you an unbiased opinion on what you’re doing well in various areas. They can also provide insight on what you could change to move forward.

 

• Build relationships with friends and family members that encourage and rejuvenate you with their positive energy. Minimize contact with those who are overly critical, jealous, or negative. They just drain your energy and bring you down.

 

By surrounding yourself with positive individuals, you’ll receive the boost of energy and confidence you need to power through your moments of self-doubt. You’ll then begin to achieve your goals and dreams, rather than holding yourself back!

 

Everyone faces self-doubt and insecurities from time to time. Practicing these tips can help you defeat self-doubt once and for all.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Peace, Happiness and Light to you!

Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

 

Request a Free Coaching Session Today! 

Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

 


8 WAYS TO FIRE UP YOUR MOTIVATION

Posted on August 18, 2015 at 12:35 AM Comments comments (0)

“People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.” Zig Ziglar

 

Today’s Book: Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book That Changes Lives By Dan Millman

 

Motivation is a common commodity when you’re heading to the beach or shopping for a new car. But some tasks are not enjoyable, and motivation can be sometimes be hard to muster up. Creating motivation is a skill, and there are several techniques that can be helpful. The ability to motivate yourself is among the most important skills you can have.

 

Try these tips when you need to boost your motivation:

 

1. Keep your attention on the end result rather than the process of getting there. When you find yourself getting bogged down with a large project, remind yourself of the goal. It’s challenging to get started when it’s necessary to put in 100 hours of work or to lose 50 lbs. If your motivation is lacking, focus on how great you’ll feel when the objective has been met.

 

2. Schedule regular breaks. Working for 8 hours straight might seem daunting, but knowing that you can take a break in 60 minutes can free up your mind enough to focus intently for an hour. Approach your work 60 minutes at time and you’ll be done before you know it.

 

3. Stand up and move around. Short periods of intense exercise can improve creativity, sharpen the mind, and decrease stress. Find an activity appropriate for your environment.

 

4. Give yourself rewards as milestones are reached. Think of a few self-indulgences that you consider motivating. Break your work into reasonable chunks and give yourself a small reward as the milestones are met.

 

     • These rewards can be very small. An ice cream, smoothie or a short break might be enough to get through a rough patch.

 

5. Do whatever it takes to get started. It’s surprising how motivation can seemingly appear from nowhere if you can just take the first step. Waiting for inspiration to get started is a mistake. You’re likely to notice that the work wasn’t nearly as disagreeable as you thought. You’ll probably be impressed with your progress and begin to feel motivated.

 

     • Whether it’s writing one sentence, making one phone call, or doing one pushup, do whatever it takes to get the ball rolling.

 

6. Find inspiration through a song or video. YouTube is loaded with inspirational movie clips and presentations. Maybe there is a particular song that motivates you. A couple of minutes spent on this sort of activity can be well worth the time. Consider listening to a favorite song or watching a video on your break time.

 

     • Avoid getting distracted and wasting hours. Five minutes is enough!

 

7. Use a timer. A timer is a very effective way to focus the mind and get things done. Knowing that the seconds are ticking away is very motivating.

 

     • Having a timer also eliminates the questions of deciding how much to do or when to stop and take a break. You stop when the timer stops.

 

8. Make a list of the benefits you’ll receive upon completion. Will you finally have the money to pay all of your bills and take a trip? Will you be proud to show off your body at the beach? Can you realize your dream of gaining acceptance into graduate school?

 

     • Keep the list handy and review it whenever your motivation is lacking.

 

Strive to further develop your ability to motivate yourself. Self-motivation is a powerful tool for creating a successful life. Remember that the most challenging task can be to take the first step. Get started and you’ll find that your motivation begins to grow!

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!

Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!
Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

 

 


DISCOVER THE BENEFITS OF A WEEKEND WITHOUT TELEVISION

Posted on July 31, 2015 at 12:40 AM Comments comments (0)

“As parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts we need to start getting out into nature with the young people in our lives. Families play a key role in getting kids outside.” David Suzuki

 

Today’s Book: Search Inside Yourself: The Unexpected Path to Achieving Success, Happiness (and World Peace) By Chade-Meng Tan

 

How much time do you spend watching television? I couldn’t believe it when I read that according to recent research, adults between the ages of 35 and 50 watch over 33 hours of TV per week. That’s almost 5 hours per day. OK, sure, it’s fair to say that most people watch more television on the weekends than they do during the week. But think about all the things you could do with that time!

 

If you have followed my blog in the past you know I spend a lot of time in the outdoors. I’m such an advocate for getting outside and just breathing in the fresh air whenever possible. The mountain air, the ocean air, where ever you can go to get some fresh air, just get out there and breathe.

 

How much different would your life be if you spent those 5 hours each day that you watch TV working on something else? Consider the changes you could make to your health, social life, family life, and / or personal development.

 

I have a challenge for you:

Spend one weekend without TV and see what might happen!!

 

1. You’ll be forced to investigate other interests. Watching television is often a default action. It’s what you do when you are bored and have nothing else to do. Invention is the mother of necessity. Without your default distraction, you’ll have to find other ways to entertain yourself.

 

• Maybe you’ll find something even more enjoyable. You’ll certainly find something more productive.

 

2. You can spend more time with your family or friends. Instead of watching the ball game or Rocky for the 12th time, go out and play a game of ball! Have a cookout in the backyard. Go camping. Take a weekend road trip. Or just sit together and talk – whoa that’s a big one….

 

3. You can improve your health. How would your health change if you dropped just 4 hours of television per week and spent that time exercising? This weekend is a great chance to get started on a new exercise program.

 

4. You can connect with other people. Instead of ordering a pizza and sitting in front of the TV on Saturday night, pick up the phone and call an old friend or that cousin you haven’t talked to in a while. Get out of the house and be around others. You might make a new friend or find the love of your life.

 

• If you have a family or a close group of friends, go out for a night on the town, down to the boardwalk or for ice cream by the lake. Just get out and enjoy your local surroundings.

 

5. You could read a book. Most people fail to read even one book per year. Imagine the advantage you’d have if you became a regular reader. If you don’t have the time or funds to visit India, you can read about it. Nearly every bit of information in the world can be found in a book.

 

6. It’s a great time to tackle a major project. Big projects are challenging to start. It’s much easier to gravitate to the TV and stay there until there’s not enough time left to do any real work. How about next weekend you turn off the television and take the time to tackle a major project? You will feel so accomplished and fulfilled once you clear something off your to-do list.

 

7. You can spend time with yourself. Can you stand to sit with yourself for an hour? Most people can’t. Television is a great distraction. There’s sound, moving pictures, and a compelling story. It’s a perfect way to distract yourself from your thoughts. If you’re stressed, your TV is one of your first stops. Shut down the electronics and meditate. Clear your mind and relax. As today’s picture quote states, you can find so much more in the woods. Listen to the trees, feel them, be one with your surroundings and let all else go!!

 

8. You’ll have time to address your challenges. You could use your extra time to address the aspects of your life that make you unhappy. Watching TV solves nothing. Spend that time enhancing your life by facing your challenges head-on.

 

With effective action, you can change your life quickly.

 

If you usually spend your weekend watching television, consider unplugging for just one weekend. When you see how much more you can accomplish, I’m sure you’ll want to do it more often. I guarantee that your TV habit is limiting your life. Spend more time with your family and or friends this weekend. Get out of the house and enjoy your life.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach


Request a Free Coaching Session Today!


Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

 

 


GAIN FREEDOM TO MOVE ON FROM BEING STUCK IN A RUT

Posted on May 29, 2015 at 5:35 AM Comments comments (0)

“Do you feel bored and stuck in a rut? Is work drudgery? If so, you are spending far too much time bemoaning your fate and how the universe is not cooperating with your desires. Be present with and in your current situation.” Srikumar Rao

 

Today’s Book: A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose (Oprah's Book Club, Selection 61) By Eckhart Tolle

 

Do you feel like you’ve been in a rut? Why is it that our lives rarely change, even more so when one is miserable? I’ve been there myself, so I know how it feels. I’ve had to work hard and smart to pull myself together to set goals and make some changes.

 

There are forces within our minds that conspire to keep us stuck. They’re spectacularly effective at accomplishing this. In fact, they’re so good, we don’t even realize that it’s happening.

 

These reasons may very well be the cause of your rut:

 

1. You lack the knowledge necessary to make a change. For example, you might know that you need to be more confident, but you might also lack the knowledge of how to develop that confidence. Not all skills are available at our fingertips. You might need to do a little studying before a change is possible.

 

2. You don’t know specifically what you want. If you think you might like to be a police officer, but also think becoming an accountant sounds interesting, you’re going to be stuck. At some point, it’s necessary to make a clear decision and set a goal. If you can’t choose a vacation destination, you’re going to be stuck at home.

 

3. You lack willpower or fail to use it effectively. Willpower is limited, but it’s great for creating new habits and behavioral patterns. Sticking with a task after the urge to quit surfaces can develop willpower. Continue for another 5 minutes when you want to give up. Increase the amount of time each week until you can work through the urge to give up whatever it is you are working on.

 

• Use your willpower to develop small habits that can grow into useful routines.

 

4. You can’t deal with being uncomfortable. Anxiety, nervousness, and fear are great for preventing you from jumping off a 10-story building. However, they’re worse than worthless when it comes to keeping you stuck. Some level of discomfort accompanies any change, but your emotions are misleading you. You’re not in any real danger.

 

• Use your logic to talk yourself through it. “Nothing bad can happen from giving a speech. In fact, there are many benefits.” Use the logical part of your brain to override your primitive instincts.

 

• There are many techniques to lower your levels of discomfort to more manageable levels. Meditation, prayer, and counseling are a few that can be beneficial.

 

• Start small and push through slight discomfort. Your ability to handle the bigger and scarier situations will grow with experience.

 

5. You give up too quickly. Change can take time. 80% of the change you ultimately see won’t reveal itself until at least 80% of the work has been completed. Your early efforts show little results, but things are happening behind the scenes. It’s necessary to persevere to see a meaningful change in your life.

 

• Learn to be a finisher. Start completing all the little tasks in your life. If you decide to walk on the treadmill for 20 minutes, keep going until you’re done. Avoid letting yourself off the hook until an activity is 100% complete.

 

Making any change can be a challenge. Understanding your roadblocks to change can enhance your ability to bring about meaningful changes in your life. Have an objective and develop habits that support that objective. Learn to deal with uncomfortable emotions. You have everything within in you necessary to create a spectacular life. Go for it! If you need some coaching and help setting goals don’t hesitate to call me.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach


Request a Free Coaching Session Today!


Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

 


6 GRATITUDE-BUILDING STRATEGIES TO BRIGHTEN YOUR DAY

Posted on May 1, 2015 at 5:00 AM Comments comments (0)

“Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.” William Arthur Ward

 

Today’s Book: The Secret by Rhonda Byrne

 

Last night I had a group coaching class scheduled where the majority of the registrants didn’t show. Bummer right? NOT…. I was GRATEFUL for the opportunity to have the time to conduct the class. I was GRATEFUL for the seminar room that was available to me to conduct the class. I was GRATEFUL that at least one person was able to take away something positive from the experience of attending my class.

 

I know not everyone would’ve responded the way I did. Most of us are constantly under pressure and on the go with our fast-paced lifestyles. It's only natural to occasionally feel worn out or even a bit down from time to time after preparing, working and putting so much into all you do.

 

The good news is that something as simple as refocusing your attention from your challenges to acknowledging the things that you are grateful for in your life can instantly boost your mood.

 

Studies show that practicing gratitude on a regular basis can raise your mood and also boost your self-esteem, will power, long term health, and even your level of success in life!

 

Beat the blues with these practices to help you develop your sense of gratitude:

 

1. Keep a list of the things you’re grateful for. The next time that you feel angry, frustrated, or a bit depressed, make a list and literally count your blessings. Making a list helps you to stop obsessing over the current situation.

 

• Don't stop at just one list. Consider keeping a gratitude journal to record the things and events in your life for which you are grateful. Over time, you create a tangible record of all of the positive aspects of your life.

 

• Remember the Law of Attraction is also based on the simple principle of gratitude. Like attracts like. You attract what you are grateful for. So be grateful for what you have now and be grateful for what you don’t have yet but think of having it now in the present.


2. Start the day on a positive note. Set the tone and focus for the rest of your day by taking a few moments each morning to review the positive things in your life.

 

• Self-questions can be a great way to focus on the positive aspects of your life. Good questions to ask include: “What's something good that is happening right now,” “What opportunities await me today,” or “Whose love am I grateful for?”


3. Be alert to the goodness all around you. It's hard to have a positive attitude if you focus on only the negative things happening around you. Make a point to consciously seek the good in everything, especially in small, simple things such as a child's innocent laughter or the beauty found in nature.

 

4. Perform random acts of kindness. You can increase your own gratitude by being someone else's reason for thankfulness. Practice random acts of kindness by unexpectedly helping others.

 

• What may seem like a small act to you can be a very large act of generosity to someone who is in need. Look for opportunities each day to help someone else. The other person will be thankful for your generosity and you’ll be grateful for the boost in your self-esteem and mood.

 

5. A picture is worth a thousand words. Why not document the things that you’re grateful for by recording them with a photo? You can even spread the good thoughts around by sharing your gratitude pictures on your social media accounts.

 

6. Save notes of gratitude, instead of loose change, in a jar. Too busy to make gratitude lists or keep a gratitude journal? Try writing short notes about gratitude to yourself and keeping them in a jar!

 

• Whenever you need an encouraging word, remove one of the notes and read it to instantly perk up your mood!

 

• As the end of the year draws to a close, look back over your gratitude notes to be reminded of all of the good things that happened to you throughout the year.

 

There are difficult times in everyone's life, but practicing gratitude on a regular basis gives you the power and inspiration to remain positive as you overcome challenges.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach


Request a Free Coaching Session Today!

 

Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

 


LEARN TO BE LESS DEFENSIVE

Posted on April 28, 2015 at 5:55 AM Comments comments (0)

“You have to feel confident. If you don't, then you're going to be hesitant and defensive, and there'll be a lot of things working against you.” Clint Eastwood

 

Today’s Book: How to Win Friends & Influence People By Dale Carnegie http://astore.amazon.com/licodm-20/detail/0671027034

 

The last few days in my house have been very tense. My ex-husband and my oldest son have been at a cross roads and not communicating very clearly what they want and need from their relationship with each other. They each feel like the other is attacking verbally. Watching this is heartbreaking.

 

Each of them is on the defense. My son defending his side, breaks down and doesn’t want to communicate at all at points. His father in turn is like a battle ram with his words constantly hitting the same points over and over again and defending his position. Then I get involved, and snap by bringing things up from the past to defend my position and defend my son just to try and put my ex back in his place. All of us handling the situation the best way we can but not very effectively.

 

Being defensive is usually a less than optimal way of responding. Being defensive serves to escalate the situation and create further barriers to meaningful communication. Whether something was said to you in spite, or you merely misinterpreted a comment, avoiding an aggressive response is often more prudent.

 

I thought long and hard about today’s blog and what I did to move forward from my situation and what else we could have done. So here are some ways to stop being so defensive:

 

1. Realize that everyone is doing the best they can. That’s not to say that everyone is demonstrating 100% of their potential. But each minute of the day, everyone is operating the best they can, given their mood, past experiences, skills, coping skills, and so on. If you can adopt this belief, it’s just about impossible for anyone to upset you.

 

2. It isn’t personal. We can all be grumpy. You might remind someone of their ex. Some individuals are just rude. Allow someone to have a bad day without allowing it to ruin yours. Everyone has their own biases and opinions.

 

3. Clarify. We often jump to conclusions. Before you do, ask a few questions. Know what’s going on before taking things to the next level.

 

4. Pause. How many times would you have changed your words or deeds if only you had waited 30 seconds? Give yourself a minute to respond if you’re feeling emotionally charged. Consider how much easier your life would be with simple pauses sprinkled throughout your day.

 

5. Stop defending yourself. If you have a healthy level of self-esteem, you’re much less likely to be defensive. Be comfortable with who you are.

 

6. Relax. The more stressed you are, the more likely you are to respond quickly and inappropriately. When you’re calm and relaxed, you’re more capable of responding in a reasonable manner.

 

• Make a list of activities that relax your mind and body. Spend time engaging in one of them each hour.

 

7. Figure out if the criticism is accurate. We may not recognize the areas in which we require a little work. Examine the criticism you receive from others and judge the accuracy. If it’s accurate, be grateful and apply the newfound knowledge. If it’s inaccurate, LET IT GO and move on.

 

8. Realize that you’re less than perfect. If you can accept the fact that you don’t know everything, it’s easier to respond in a more appropriate way.

 

Be mature enough to admit when you’ve erred, rather than getting defensive. It will satisfy whomever you’re interacting with and defuse the situation.

 

9. Understand what being defensive is costing you. Think about the consequences you’ve experienced by being defensive. soured relationships, issues at work, alienated family members, and loneliness can all be consequences of overreacting.

 

Realizing the negative impact defensiveness can have on your life will enhance your motivation to change.

 

10. Make a list of your positive qualities. When you’re feeling defensive, reflect on a quality you like about yourself. This can be challenging in the moment, so it helps to have a list of your positive qualities already in mind.

 

• Reminding yourself your self-worth is a worthwhile habit to develop.

 

Everyone has been overly defensive from time to time. It’s part of being human. But there are negative consequences to being overly defensive. If you can learn to be less defensive, your journey through life will be a lot less bumpy.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach


Request a Free Coaching Session Today!


Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!


Heal Broken Relationships with 4 Steps to Communicating Better

Posted on April 24, 2015 at 7:00 AM Comments comments (0)

“Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible - the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.” Virginia Satir

 

Today’s Book: Crucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, Second Edition by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler

 

When there is conflict in a relationship, the last thing that many of us want to do is to have a conversation with the other party, especially if we feel that they have wronged us.

 

However, if you want a resolution to the tension and pain that the conflict has caused, it really is a good idea to talk to the other person. Many times, you can gain insight into why the conflict began and learn what steps are necessary to heal the relationship and yourself!

 

Here are 4 proven steps to increase dialogue with others and strengthen your relationships:

 

1. Begin to reopen communication by listening. You can learn about the other person's feelings and beliefs when you practice active listening. Many conflicts begin when one of the parties wants to be heard, as we all do, but believes that no one is listening.

 

• Rather than thinking about whether you agree with what the speaker is saying, learn to focus on their words. Give the speaker verbal and visual cues that let them know that you hear what they’re saying.

 

2. Set some ground rules. Make it safe for the other party to open up to you, and for you to share your perspective.

 

• Set a time limit for each person to speak, and the other person to listen. Usually 5 to 10 minutes is a good time frame.

 

• Then, the listener should summarize what they’ve heard, so the speaker knows they were listening and understood their meaning.

 

• Swap places and allow the other party to share their thoughts.

 

3. Emphasize the positive. Avoid placing blame, being judgmental and making demands.

 

Let the other person know how their actions affect you without attacking them or making accusations.

 

• Explain what they can do to make it easier for you to communicate with them. Ask what you can do to enhance your communications.

 

• Avoid yelling matches. When we yell at one another, we are no longer listening, but trying to force our view on the other. If you feel frustrated and tempted to yell, take a time out and agree to discuss the situation again once you’ve regained control of your feelings.

 

• Rather than making demands or giving ultimatums, let your partner know how you feel and what you want by making a respectful request, with the full understanding that they have the freedom to comply or deny the request.

 

• Take ownership for your part in misunderstandings. Determine how the choices you’ve made may have led up to the current conflict.

 

4. Learn to respond rather than react. Take the time to plan your response, rather than letting your emotions get away from you. Consider how your response will be received.

 

• If you have a hard time managing your anger or other emotions, relaxation techniques like taking a deep breath can help you lower your stress and deal more effectively with them. This may take some practice but in good time you will be able to handle situations better.

 

While most of us spend a good part of our day talking with others, true communication takes time and practice to master. These tips can help you to develop your dialogue skills and strengthen your relationships with others.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach


Request a Free Coaching Session Today!


Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!


EARTH DAY 2015 - 9 SECRETS TO LIVING A MEANINGFUL LIFE

Posted on April 22, 2015 at 6:05 AM Comments comments (0)

“On Earth Day, we celebrate all the gifts the world and nature make available to us. We recognize our complete dependence on its bounty. And we acknowledge the need for good stewardship to preserve its fruits for future generations.” John Hoeven

 

Today’s Book: Search Inside Yourself: The Unexpected Path to Achieving Success, Happiness (and World Peace) by Chade-Meng Tan 

 

Earth Day is a very important day for me because I am spiritually connected to nature. As I’ve mentioned in a number of blogs before I love to hike and meditate in the mountains. I find myself very drawn to and one with the natural surroundings of our planet. Yes, many have called me a tree hugger and I do not like to print more than I have to.

 

I advertise more via social media than in print for this same reason. I prefer to buy local and support our mom and pop stores vs chain stores. I have solar panels on my home, recycle and prefer organic, clean eating to promote a more sustainable healthy life.

 

Finding things in our lives to be passionate about helps us to lead meaningful lives. However, I do know the hustle and bustle of daily life can sweep us away from what really means the most to us. It’s up to each of us to figure out how to live a personally fulfilling life. Although much of your life is shared with others, you can still carve out your own space for a rich, meaningful life.

 

Take action now to live a life that you love:

 

1. Clarify what matters to you. How you spend your time largely determines what’s important to you. If you say your family is at the top of your list, do you spend the bulk of your spare time with them? When you know for sure who and what matters most to you, then that’s where you want to focus your time and energy.

 

2. Stay in the moment. If you’re planting flowers, think about packing the earth well and digging the hole deeply enough. Remind yourself to water them immediately afterward. Regardless of what you’re involved in, keep your mind focused.

 

• Even when you’re washing the pots and pans, you can concentrate on having nice, hot water and shining the outside of the pans the way you like them.

 

3. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Do your words carry importance and honesty, along with kindness and care? Avoid mincing words. Get to the point, but remember to take the other person’s feelings into consideration. When your discussions contain subjects of interest and heartfelt feelings, it’s meaningful for you and the listener.

 

4. Find your passion. What gets you interested, excited, or fascinated? Has there ever been a topic that you think about all day long to the point where you can hardly stand it? If so, follow your passion. Make it an important part of your life as often as you can.

 

• If it’s golf, play it as often as you can. If your passion is working with children, then pursue it, whether it’s through working at a nursery school, becoming a school teacher, or serving as the neighborhood babysitter. Make it happen.

 

5. Worry less about what others think. Pay more attention to what you think. If someone isn’t a relevant player in your personal life, then what they believe about you is irrelevant. What you believe about yourself is what matters!

 

• Use your emotional fortitude in ways that make your life better. Ensure that your opinion of yourself is great!

 

6. Instead of complaining, accept the situation or take action. If what you’re upset about is out of your control, it might be time to just accept it. However, if it’s something that’s within your power to change, take action. Complaining is a waste of your precious time. Focus on problem-solving instead.

 

7. Accept responsibility for your life. If you’re unhappy, there’s no reason to blame your parents, spouse, or boss. Step up and make some decisions to alter what troubles you.

 

• You are the captain of your own ship. Figure out the course you want to take and then stay on it.

 

8. Refuse to criticize. Focus on assessing your own life instead. Notice the good qualities in others. Making positive changes in yourself is where your power lies!

 

9. “Be the change you want to see in the world.” Mahatma Gandhi, a great man of peace, first said this quote. Make a difference in your own life and the lives of others. You’ll absolutely love yourself for it. Others will love what you’re doing, too. Volunteer. Join a club. Get involved!

 

An enriching life is here for the taking. When your focus is clear, you can then expend your energy on the people and things that matter most in your life. Isn’t it time to begin the journey toward a life filled with positivity and meaning? You deserve it! Dream More, Do More – contact Life Coach DM and I’ll help you set your goals into motion!!

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach


Request a Free Coaching Session Today!


Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!

 


OVERCOME LAZINESS AND GET THINGS DONE

Posted on April 20, 2015 at 8:55 AM Comments comments (0)

“Laziness may appear attractive, but work gives satisfaction.” Anne Frank

 

Today’s Book: See You at the Top: 25th Anniversary Edition By Zig Ziglar

 

Who hasn’t felt a little lazy from time to time? There are days where the most attractive choice is to do nothing. This can be an issue, however, when the desire to be lazy coincides with a lot of pressing obligations. Rainy days like today… Monday in the Northeast first day of the week back to work… migraine setting in – uggh who wants to go to work?? OK, OK, I have to push myself so what do I have to do? Yes, I have to start my day by writing a blog!! Then I have to get my butt to work!!

 

Overcoming laziness is a skill everyone can learn and apply. Never again will you have to feel motivated in order to get things done.

 

You can overcome laziness by applying these tips:

 

1. Think about the end result rather than the process. The thought of having a clean house or a completed business report feels good. The idea of cleaning or crunching numbers does not. If you find yourself dragging your feet, concentrate on the end result. Like the idea of writing this blog and knowing that it will help others brings me joy!!

 

2. Decide to work for just 5 minutes. Taking the first step is the most challenging part. It’s often easy to continue if you can just get started. Setting a small goal can make it easier to get up off the couch. Tell yourself you can quit after 5 minutes. More often than not, you’ll keep going. Focus on getting started.

 

3. List the advantages of getting things done now. Think about the positive aspects of getting things done right now. You won’t have to worry about it tomorrow. It will be one less thing to weigh on your mind. Convince yourself that the time for action is right now.

 

4. List the disadvantages of waiting to complete your tasks. One reason we’re able to convince ourselves that laziness is okay is the belief that a task can wait. Remind yourself of the challenges that can be created by putting things off. Make a big list of everything that could go wrong if you continue to be lazy. Not going to work…. I could lose my job it I do it too often.

 

5. Remind yourself of the challenges you faced by being lazy in the past. We’ve all put things off for too long and then suffered for it. Remind yourself of the real consequences you’ve faced in the past. Remember that pain and use it to inspire you. Uggh – I get back logged and then I’m rushing to play catch up on the tasks or I just feel awful because I didn’t get something done that I set out to do.

 

6. Have some exciting goals. If you feel lazy on a regular basis, maybe your goals aren’t inspiring enough. One way of knowing you’ve set an effective goal is the excitement you feel when you think about achieving it.

 

7. Break the task into smaller, manageable chunks. Big tasks can be intimidating and overwhelming. By making several small tasks, it’s much easier psychologically to get busy.

 

8. Hit the gym. When you’re struggling to take action, sometimes a little physical activity is the answer. Go for a walk or lift some weights. Any activity that gets your heart pumping can be effective to get you started on a task that you’re putting off.

 

9. Get organized. It’s common to feel less than motivated when your surroundings are cluttered. Take a few minutes to make your surroundings a little tidier. It might just be the kick-start you need to leap into action.

 

10. Manage your self-talk. Tell yourself how great it will be to get a lot of things done and off your plate. Stand up straight, take a deep breath, and keep positive thoughts in your mind. You’ll feel the energy and motivation you need to forge ahead.

 

11. Take a nap. Is it possible you’re tired? Feeling lazy and genuine fatigue go hand-in-hand. If you’re tired, getting a little sleep might be beneficial.

 

Enjoying a lazy Sunday is certainly pleasurable. Feeling lazy on occasion is normal, but that doesn’t mean it’s always acceptable. There are times when being lazy can create real challenges. Overcoming the urge to be lazy is a useful life skill that can provide meaningful benefits. What will you do the next time you’re feeling lazy? I’m pushing forward today! What about you!

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach

Request a Free Coaching Session Today!

 

Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!



3 WAYS TO KNOW YOU'RE ON THE RIGHT CAREER TRACK

Posted on April 16, 2015 at 5:15 AM Comments comments (0)

“A career path is rarely a path at all. A more interesting life is usual a more crooked, winding path of missteps, luck and vigorous work. It is almost always a clumsy balance between the things you try to make happen and the things that happen to you.” Tom Freston


Today’s Book: The Success Principles(TM) - 10th Anniversary Edition: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be by Jack Canfield, Janet Switzer 

 

Deciding on a career can sometimes be difficult. After spending a few years studying in a particular field, one would think that your career choice is obvious. Sometimes, though, uncertainty looms because you aren't fully connected to the field.

 

I know too many people who went to college for one thing and wound up in a completely different field of work. Have you chosen a certain career direction because your parents wanted you to do it? Or like me, wound up in a field because you just kept following where the money led you to not where your heart wanted to go? Keep in mind that your ideal career should be something that still gives you joy ten years down the line.

 

Today, I’m running a Young and New Professionals Event for the professional organization which I am the president of the local chapter here on Long Island. One of the things I point out every year to those entering the profession is that they must be excited about their choice of career. They must be passionate about the work they are doing. It makes a world of difference years down the line.

 

Use this guide to figure out if you’re on the right career path:

 

1. You have an innate skill set. Some individuals are just more naturally aligned with certain careers than others. Is that the case with you and your career choice?

 

• Think back to your childhood. Is your work related to something that you had a knack for growing up? Did related activities interest you? If yes, you're probably on the right track.

 

• How easy is it for you to understand the field's complex concepts? If you find yourself breezing through things that others find difficult, you likely have the natural ability for it.

 

• Do you feel "at home" finding solutions to challenges in your field? If so, it likely means that you're doing what you're meant to be doing.

 

2. Your eyes light up when working. On the flip side of having natural abilities is the concept of being passionate. You're probably good at many things, but which ones are you passionate about?

 

• If your eyes light up, it represents excitement about doing something that aligns with your soul. You can put it right up there with sharing special moments with beloved family members.

 

• Are there times when hours pass by without you even realizing it? Being so engrossed in your work that very little else matters usually means that you love what you're doing!

 

• Once you find yourself talking about your career to family, friends, and even strangers, you're likely in the career of your dreams! Is your career constantly on the forefront of your mind?

 

3. Your earning power is irrelevant. Careers that cater to the passionate side are usually fulfilling all on their own. There's a pride you get from producing something good, regardless of what your paycheck looks like.

 

• When you're doing something you love, you spend your time ensuring you do it well. The financial benefit that comes along with work is important, but it’s definitely secondary to doing something you love!

 

• Have you ever found that bonuses on the job feel less exciting to you than to your co-workers? It's probably because the income plays second fiddle in your life.

 

• Strangely enough, working in a fulfilling career negates the desire to seek material fulfillment elsewhere. You may even find that your earnings pile up because you really don’t have the desire to spend it!

 

The formula for assessing career suitability is really easy. For the most part, it just requires a little introspection. Give thought to what matters most to you. If, after defining those things, your career comes out on top, you're on the right track.

 

Take the time to listen to your heart as you choose your life’s work. Be thoughtful when it comes to determining your ideal career path. Remember, it’s also possible to have more than one. I have found this true for myself. I love what I do full time and I love what I am transitioning out to do here as a Life Coach. Each has a time and place in my life. I am passionate about both and wouldn’t be me if I didn’t give both my all. I do however, look forward to the day when I retire from the corporate world and can focus fully on coaching all of my clients when they need me without working around a full time work schedule. I know that day is just on the horizon.

 

Continue to follow me on my journey!
Join me on your own journey!
Let's do this together!


Peace, Happiness and Light to you!
Dawn-Marie
Your Life Coach


Request a Free Coaching Session Today!


Check out all the recommended readings and
purchase you next book in the Life Coach DM Book Store!


Rss_feed